Cinema_PSYOPS_BozFestBonus2: Bullsh*t Artists Episode 1

Cinema_PSYOPS_BozFestBonus2: Bullsh*t Artists Episode 1 Hi OCD remnants! “What’s this?” we hear you cry! “Another show?”Yes in our grief about the end of OCD, Boz and Cort managed to get together to bash out a proof of concept show and we are posting here for you wonderful people to gauge response.Please take a listen and let us know your thoughts. Would you like more of this drivel? Sincerely yours ‘The Bullshit Artists’ 

*Music*

Hello everybody and welcome to the very first episode of Bromance Bullshit Artists.

My name is Boz and I am joined for the first time and forever for this show, the mighty court.

Hey hello sir.

How mighty am I?

Really? Not very.

*Laughs*

Well, I'm judging the mightiness by your beard, which I have seen pictures of and is indeed mighty.

It is now. Yeah, it has grown to be quite uh...

Umm... Unstoppable?

Must have?

No.

Sideburns?

No.

Go to your... maybe... beard... beard!

*Music*

I was gonna say unobtainium, but that's just ridiculous and stupid, who would ever come up with a term like that?

Has it achieved sentience yet?

Is that- that's the thing?

Uh, no, but it is being used against me as a weapon whenever my wife gets mad.

She just shoves it up into my nose 'cause it really pisses me off and she just does that.

*Laughs*

Wow, I mean, that's fine. As long as it gets to the point she starts trying to set light to it, then you've really got a problem.

Yeah, 'cause it will go up like a fucking... just like a house on fire and like nothing.

'Cause there's usually oil in it that's either beard oil or just whatever I just ate, Rasputin style.

So, like, she likes my beard on fire, my whole head's going ghost-writer in a matter of milliseconds.

I mean, it's a fucking metal way to die. You think about it?

Well, yeah, running around with your head on fire, screaming Jesus fucking Christ. Yeah, that's perfect.

That's- I mean, that- that may have been the way the teenage me would've wanted to go.

Yeah, he died happy.

*Laughs*

He said he always wanted to be ghost-writer. I guess he just went a little too far with it.

*Laughs*

So, for those who may have just randomly found this weird, very weirdly titled podcast on the internet, who the fuck are we?

Um... I host cinema sciops regularly.

What's Amazon? Oh, fuck off!

The following show will destroy your self-worth with excessive expletives, overtly descriptive sexual deviance,

and more desperation for external validation than any so-called entertainment should ever be allowed.

Two talentless losers who are about as insightful or provocative as a comatose gelly-fiction cinema sciops.

I am one-third of the now-defunct obsessive cinema discourse.

I am one-third of the- oh, what the fuck is that name?

Uh, Invasion of the Sockserman? Cast? This part of Kill the Cast? I can't even remember the name of my own show that I'm a part of.

Um, I've been podcasting now with cinema sciops for just over five years.

I'm on my fifth year with that now.

And, uh, I guess spot all the time because I am a guest spot whore.

I can't get enough external validation.

Well, I also know another thing about you.

Almost that.

You're a bullsh*t in Arnie's.

You're a bullsh*t artist!

Bullsh*t artist!

Bullsh*t artist!

Bullsh*t artist!

Bullsh*t by this!

If anyone hasn't seen the greasy strangler, that just made no fucking sense, but you'll get used to it.

And they also just clicked off, so those of you that stuck with us and are also greasy strangler fans?

Hi, how you doing?

Portho!

Anyway, Kort is also what I call a- a real podcaster because he has a work ethic.

And in five years has put out more episodes of podcasts than I have in my entire podcasting career of double that time.

So, yeah, this is- yeah, you've got two sides of a coin here, so you could go wrong.

As of the recording we're doing right now, I have gone 214 weeks straight without missing a release.

Yep.

And I have also not re-released a different episode from a different place as just a placeholder, like some other podcasters that have done that.

Never done that.

Who have just said that they've just done a release so that they didn't miss a week?

I have recorded something, edited something and released it, even if it is just a music show.

I have done something new, so it's been 214 weeks of new content straight.

And I have just recorded the 215th week, so barring my death and/or major problems, that will also be released 215 weeks straight.

He's also incredibly humble about it.

As I lost it.

I released at least five shows in the last year and a half.

It's like that.

[laughter]

I don't know how humble I am about it.

I just feel that this is something to brag about, and just I wanted to point out, like, the caveats.

Because a lot of people were like, "Oh, yeah, 215 episodes a big deal."

That's 215 straight weeks of brand new content recorded either on a Monday or Tuesday, sometimes Wednesday at the latest, and out by the following Sunday.

Like, it's within one week, within usually seven days, I'm recording and releasing an episode.

For the last 215 sets of seven day weeks.

Yeah, for those of you who've never had to record or edit a podcast, you don't quite know what the editing involves.

Some people just fucking half-ass it.

They have a conversation on Skype.

What's at all?

They don't do anything to the levels, and they just chuck it out as a show and go, "There you go."

The likes of myself and court, we are audio tarts.

[laughter]

It's got to be right.

It's got to sound good.

And we take the time to edit it, we put EQs, compressors, whatever on our audio files.

That's what should be happening.

And I can empathize because a while back I did a rather ridiculous internet radio show called The Fantastic Adventures of Boss and Casey.

[music]

This is Firebrand Rocks, and you are listening to the fantastic adventures of Boss and Casey.

[music]

God, damn you all the hell!

[music]

What makes you think she's a w--?

Oh, she turned me into a nuke!

A nuke?

You know nothing, Jon Snow.

[music]

Got better.

And we did 38 straight weeks the same, and I had to produce a two-hour radio show every single week.

I had three days to produce it because of the turnaround from recording to getting the file uploaded, which included putting the music in, getting the adverts and the time syncs for the hour and half hour markers to line up.

And that's-- I mean, it's hard to do live, and that's a skill of being a radio person, but if you're actually pre-recorded, it's almost as difficult because you've got to make those timings work.

And I'm not going to do that thing. I'm halfway through talking or halfway through a song, and then I play a half on the hour stinger and just mess it up.

So I sit there obsessing about it. It's fucking hard work.

So you have my utmost respect for that work ethic, sir, because it's not fucking easy.

Yeah, and now somehow you've found the time to do this.

Well, and that's the other thing too.

Like, I can guess as much as possible where it's like, if I got the free time, especially with what you're asking me to do, where you're like, just come on and bullshit.

I mean, I can do that. I mean, try and stop me from doing that.

Like, that's like-- most of the content of my show is me trying to rein in this kind of talk anyway, so it was something that I was like, "Yes, let's do this."

You know, that's absolutely not a problem.

But the hardest part is trying to stay on task, and when you're trying to do like a specific movie review and you're trying to get it in in a certain amount of time, but you're constantly way laid by your own Jack Assery, it's really difficult to do.

So this is cathartic for you, so-- Yeah.

Because we realized, I guess it on court show, he's guess it on my show, and we found that we-- if we had the time, we often caught squeeze for time, but when we did have the time, we would record the show and then talk for normally as long again off air.

And they're like, "Well, this kind of shit we could just put out there, because people have probably listened to it."

And hence, the bromance at the beginning of the title of this show, because it's sort of blossomed because we found we had so much common ground.

Yeah, I blame Duncan, actually, for the danger to both of our marriages.

Yes.

Yeah, Doug, the McLeast of the podcast, under the stage, you have a lot to answer for, sir.

Look what you've created.

Yeah, both of our wives want to know what the fuck.

[laughter]

Yeah.

So, for those of you who don't know me, my name is Boz.

I used to do a show called "Here Goes Nothing" way back in the day.

I then started doing a show called "The Little Potter Horrors," which went away, came back, went away, came back, and it's just come back, and it's now on Legion Pop.

And it's now on Legion Pop.

The home of CinemaPsyops.

One of us!

One of us!

[laughter]

We are many.

Yes, we are.

We are network bedfellows.

I like that.

So...

Well, you could have just stopped at bedfellows, but if you want to modify it with network to make it seem less odd, then that's fine.

And we did sort of try and, like, we wanted to podcast together other than guest spots, and so did our good buddy, The Witch.

But he's down in Australia, and we really tried to make obsessive cinema discourse work, but the time difference was just fucking, like, sinking it up and getting something done.

It was just so difficult.

Yeah, we had a very small window of Super Late Friday for you right after work on Friday for me, but asked early in the morning for Witch, and it just wasn't working out.

And the time difference between you and I works out and the time difference between you and Witch can work out, but trying to sync up the three of us just...

It wasn't working, and I think we all lost the motivation to do it.

I think Witch just got fed up again.

Oh, there's another show coming out.

Oh, I sound miserable as fuck again, because I was only half-free through my coffee when I had to try and sound, like, innovative and interested and funny and whatever.

I think he did an amazing job, because trust me, if it was me doing the nine o'clock in the morning slot, would it just been a series of grunts and swearing?

Would it spit it?

Well, I've had to do a few nine o'clock in the morning recordings, and you can definitely tell the difference in my energy level.

Yeah.

I just got done doing a bloody pit of Rod, and no, that's not a sex act.

That's actually a podcast.

We talked about the Cough and Joe movies, and I just finished the last one.

The last recording I did with him was like eight something or nine something in the morning, because I was trying to get out to the director's cut of mid-summer, and I wanted to make sure that I got there in time, so I needed to give him ample time.

I had to give him ample time to record, so I was adjusting back from the time that I was expecting to go see that, and it just ended up that I had to get up on a Saturday morning at the butt crack of dawn.

So I totally understand.

That's the fucking worst.

You can't be witty.

You can't be funny.

Half the time you're barely keeping your eyes open.

Actually, I got to do my favorite film ever on your podcast, and it was so...

I was in a hotel room.

I didn't want people banging on the door telling me off of being noisy.

I'd hemmed myself into the corner with duvets and pillows to try and deaden the sound as much as possible.

And it was really fucking late after a long day.

And you could hear the energy on me on that show was just not representative of how much I loved that movie.

So, yeah, sometimes a scheduling could just kick in a pants.

So...

Yeah, it's a real pain.

Yeah.

But we're not into bitch about podcasting, because we enjoy it, and that's why we're doing this.

So basically we called it bullshit eyes, because we just thought, let's when we can get on mic and just shoot the shit.

And just talk about the things we love, and hopefully you guys enjoy coming along for the ride.

That's the idea, really.

Well, and the bromance thing I think is pretty self-explanatory for anyone who actually knows how long we've been getting along.

Ever since...

What was that the...

We did the mist where we talked about that together on teapods like ages ago, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, because that was it, because I was fairly new to Legion at the time.

I'd heard promos and stuff, I hadn't got the time to listen to stuff, and then we were put on the roster together.

I was like, "Well, I'll never go on a show until I've checked someone out and got to know them virtually through their podcast."

And I started listening to cinema psyops that week, and I haven't stopped.

(laughter)

Our lunacy can be addictive, I've heard that.

(laughter)

Yeah, it's a muscleist every week for me.

So, yeah, so we share the horror thing, which is, I suppose, where it all started.

We're going to try and not bring too much horror to this show, because this isn't a horror show, but given our love for the genre, it's going to come up.

Well, I mean...

In fact, I'm just going to say that the director's cut of mid-summer.

No one's told me about that.

Oh, wow.

Was there much more?

Yes.

What you would expect from normal director's cuts is not necessarily what you get in this film.

What it does is it flushes out the characters so much more, and it has a lot more backstory about the relationships, and it actually helps character motivations make a little bit more sense.

You do get an additional ritual where someone is supposed to be sacrificed by being thrown into a lake, which gives you an idea of the fates of one of the other characters.

And it's like a simulated ritual thing where they say that the boy's willingness to sacrifice himself is more than enough.

Oh, but like Abraham bullshit.

Yeah.

Yeah, kind of.

And so like they bring this supposed boy back.

And I mean, it's no shock to anyone that people are getting murdered with mid-summer.

Like that's not a huge spoiler, right?

Like that there are sacrifices being made.

I mean, it's like the wicker man left and right is what people are accusing it of, but it's so much more than just that.

So like you actually see the outfit that this person that was supposed to be sacrificed on one of the other people whenever their body turns up.

So like you know what her ultimate fate was.

Okay, cool.

I'm maybe saying her was probably a bad idea, but I'm trying not to get too spoilery for people about that, but I will say this that even though the director's cut is about a half hour longer, it's a much more satisfying film.

And I never feel the length of that film at all.

I'm engrossed by everything having to do with it.

And the main character, Danny, that actress, whenever she starts doing her panic attacks and the way that they film it in the movie is what it feels like to actually have a bout of an anxiety attack or a panic attack like that.

Like it actually was like almost triggering for me.

It was so exactly what it felt like for me whenever I start going into a state like that.

So I totally understood what the film was going for.

And I was totally just on her side all the time for everything that happens to her and how everybody was trying to, I don't know, the thing where everybody's talking behind her back and all that, that's kind of an accent and even more.

And that feeling of that awkwardness in the room whenever you're there, in the movie they made it seem like in the theatrical cut, it seemed more like they set a few things and then she came in the room and then they would just basically talk around her.

And try and just be like, I'm really uncomfortable, but they're trying to be like walking on kid gloves.

In the director's cut, there's a lot more of that like she's not dumb.

She can sense that that's going on, whereas in the theatrical cut, you know, like it just seems like, oh, she's just ignoring it, but like they have some more extended shots where they're showing her face and she can totally tell that she's being gaslit and by her would be boyfriend.

And then like everybody's treating her like shit.

And so whenever someone shows genuine and legit concern, like the way that she breaks down whenever Pele brings up her family and one of the conversations in the apartment before they go off to do the thing that they're going to do with the rituals, it actually feels, it has so much more emotional depth to it instead of just her just like losing her shit for no reason.

Like there's, it's more of a buildup and everything.

And I think a lot of that stuff I understand why they trimmed it down, but it makes the ending a lot more satisfying and there's a lot more stuff to it that it gives you more like pathos to all of the characters really.

I don't know if there's more gore or not.

It seems like they left that in specifically because it was so sort of like scatter shot in the film whenever you would get some of that more gross death stuff that was happening that I don't think they needed to trim any of that down.

Now granted, there are some more shots where they come back to that kind of stuff more and more where it's almost like flashbacks that Danny is having and she's trying to process everything.

But yeah, mostly it's just dealing with the interpersonal stuff a lot more with that extended cut.

Now, having said that, I will not watch the regular theatrical version and again, and I'm waiting for some way of being able to get ahold of the director's cut because that's the only version I'm going to watch again.

Well, I am convinced either this week or last week I saw, hopefully it wasn't a hoax, but there's going to be a Blu-ray release of the director's cut.

I don't know if I imagined that. Maybe I dreamt it, but I'm pretty sure I saw that somewhere.

So I'm hoping that.

Yeah, there is supposed to be a UK Blu-ray.

I forget who it is that's going to be releasing it, but it was announced and it's been all over the interwebs and if...

Okay. I did see it then.

Yeah.

If that's the case and I guess it's on Amazon and it's said that it's the director's cut, but the statistics being Amazon, they're always waiting for it.

But if you're looking at the

Amazon, they're always fucked up as to the stats or the detailed info. They may have just copy-posted that stuff from the regular Blu-ray in there or whatever it's going to be, but A24 would be complete.

They're the ones who released that, right? A24, does that sound right?

Yeah.

Well, the studio that released this would be completely stupid to make the director's cut an Apple TV exclusive only for an extended period of time.

I understand like let's say whenever digital, the digital release is coming out fine, but if you release a Blu-ray of just a theatrical cut, you are shooting yourself in the foot because they're a hardcore collectors like myself that want that physical media disc so that we can hold on to it and clutch it in the night and declare our love for it and call it our precious.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. This man, like, I sort of try and in my head, imagine what your collection of films looks like because you seem to have fucking everything.

Yeah.

You must have a whole room your house dedicated to.

Actually, the whole bottom floor of my house is sort of like my domain. Like we have a little basement area. It's Omaha.

It's a regular occurrence that happens around us. Now, while we're on the very edge of like the worst of tornado alley, it still can happen. So you want, you want a basement and barring flooding, the best place to keep your stuff for safety sake is in the basement.

So that's where all my stuff is. I have a theatrical like screening room area in my basement. And right now it's just an older projector. The things like 12 or 13 years old.

I bought the bulb to die as an excuse to buy a new one. I'm saving up for it right now. But I bought this one like right before high definition became a thing like before it like really broke like 12 to 13 years ago.

I bought this projector and it handled 1080 I when 1080p wasn't even a thing yet. And that's how old it is. But I built a theater room around that. I have a surround sound and all of that.

And basically couches. It's enough to seat about I'd say about eight people in the couch area relatively comfortably. And then we have sort of like what I call balcony. There's just a table behind this little sectional sofa that people can sit at and watch the movies from the screen.

And I call it the projector room of the beast because it is actually 6.6 feet across. I did that on purpose.

Yeah. But anyway the rest of the basement area is just sort of open and besides a little play area for cats. There's shelving units of blue rays and DVDs and all of that other stuff.

And basically I buy it once then I buy it again in the next new format. And now I'm now I'm working my way up to you know like UHD disk I guess is the way to refer to it. They call it 4K Blu-ray but UHD has been 4K UHD disk is like the new accepted term.

So like I have like 17 copies of the original Suspiria practically. Not quite that bad but bad enough. But there are some movies where I have like BHS laser disc blue ray or DVD Blu-ray and then 4K Blu-ray if they have.

There are some movies that are like that. And I'm starting to sell off some of my older stuff. So I'm parting away with some of my stuff. But I want it to be sold to somebody that's going to take care of it because I have some.

I do I collect it's it's something I do it's part of my OCD I need to collect things. So I get box sets and everything and then if I get like a like I just bought the arrow UK Mario Bava box set on Blu-ray and now that I have that.

The DVD box sets that I have that are the same movies I will probably sell to another collector who is less obsessed about 100% quality and more of just having a copy.

That kind of thing but yes I want to do the basement area of my house that's open and I haven't really done a lot with where all of these shelving are I actually want to recreate a video store I want to actually build like a mock counter that would also double as a bar.

And like put like a shitty looking you know type computer monitor that you'd be able to check movies out and I want to build built in shelves on the walls down there to store DVDs and Blu-rays and various things like that but like actually put them on display.

And one of the things that I want to do is I actually want to build a section of like used copies of stuff that like I you know that I will be selling like you know my collection that I don't want anymore.

You know that I will actually price out like you know to sell and everything.

And I'm going to display some planning on trying to display some of my older VHS tapes because right now they're just languishing and collecting dust and you know what not really collecting dust because they're in those fresh packs seal bins you know.

Because I am that OCD.

You know so it would be it would just basically be something to do and I think the reason that I can get away with doing the video store thing in the house for the basement area is if I sell it to the wife is in the mock up counter will double as a bar.

I think I can sell it as that.

I'll get some optics you sorted.

Right like it's like you know the display counter area the front of it would be like a movie store display counter you know I'll be able to display some might.

I don't know if you guys had a poster on it really if you're going old school video store they was at a poster below the counter didn't they.

Sort of yeah depends upon the store like some of them would have like a little poster thing that they would put on what I was thinking of doing is just having a bin of like old posters to like you know where they would sell their old movie posters.

Yeah or the free take one kind of thing like I wanted to do stuff like that.

The basement windows are actually covered up by these sliders that I designed in my wife and I kind of built and put down there so basically all of the windows of the basement are covered up by these things that slide in and out of the way that are just a movie poster with like a backing behind it that's the same color of the wall.

So cool when it's closed you don't know that that's what it is it just looks like it's you know raised off the wall and then a poster is mounted to it but when I open it.

Oh there's a window back there that lets in daylight.

Nice so that's often yeah all you vampires out there that want a place to hang out my place we're good.

Awesome.

With you mentioned laser disc I only know one other person who had a laser disc player and collected laser disc and he just happened to be the infamous Mark the Bastard who is getting me into the sickest Euro import band horror movies.

What was laser disc just the domain of the obsessive horror collector do you think?

Well I would say that it was the domain of the obsessive movie collector because at the time that laser disc came out there's some dueling formats and I don't know how much you want me to get into this but there was like there was like.

It depends how many listeners you want to have.

All right I'll make it as quick as possible so there was like video disc which was basically like the equivalent of a record but instead of having just audio waveforms etched into it it would have sort of like a movie like a like a sync that you would get like through the cable signal or like an antenna signal of what your your TV would have it was embedded into the video disc.

That died a very quick and painful death.

That did not last very long they were very cost prohibitive and then there was something else that was similar to video disc that I can't remember the name of it but laser disc was basically the same technology as a CD they just basically expanded it out and made it into dinner plates.

Right so it could play video and you would get basically like 20 minutes to a half hour per side so if your movie was like if your movie was like two hours it's like three discs on like four sides.

It's 10 over halfway if you play I couldn't read both sides right now the players actually worked around that where some of the players would actually have like a mirror thing to where it would just automatically switch over and it would be less of a less of a jump.

Now I think the reason that laser discs ended up becoming more of a horror fanatics thing is because they didn't have for the most part laser disc didn't really have like a region locking like they started doing with DVD.

So you could import a laser disc from the Netherlands or Japan or whatever and you could be able to play it on your laser disc at your home no problem it would just play because it was the same technology it was the same thing with like a CD CDs were never region locked so that's how it worked.

And I think a lot of us particularly like say Mark the bastard in the UK would probably be looking for laser discs because that was a way to circumvent the video nasty stuff that you guys were suffering from and also they were significantly easier to hide because you could just toss your laser disc among your records and no one would be any of the wiser because they were the exact same size and shape.

Now I don't think anyone who was raiding houses looking for dodgy horror but like they did raid the film collectors fairs that we used to go to and it was always if you've got a good quality band film it was normally somebody had ripped from laser disc to VHS and you'd go to the guys who had lots of horror films ago.

You got anything else and they just pull this box out from under the table right right you say you got anything else and you point down as a thunder under the table.

But they were brazen about actually and I was actually shocked at how they they would just pick up the box and dump it on top of the table and let you leave through it there.

And then we heard about a year, year and a half later after the last one we went to the police raided these these fairs and basically confiscated all these illegal films.

But that's how I saw a clockwork orange the exorcist which were still banned at that time in this country you know and now you can pick him up in the kiddie section.

And over here collectors that weren't able to get certain films just because they were never released in America like some of Dario Argento stuff.

I'll give you a perfect example Delamorte Delamorte was never really released in its full version over here in the United States.

It was like chopped up and releases like Cemetery Man.

It has subsequently been released on DVD under the title of Cemetery Man but completely uncut.

But that movie whenever I got a hold of it I bought a bootleg of it that was recorded from a Japanese laser disc that actually had Japanese subtitles playing as it was going.

But the picture was pristine and I fucking loved it and I was totally fine with that.

And it was a first generation dupe because they were recorded directly from the laser disc and they just basically had like this looping thing where they would just play it on a loop and then just keep recording it to various tapes and then switch it over.

You know that's just how they did it. I know my copy of Delamorte Delamorte was like that.

I think my first VHS of Killer Clowns from Outer Space was from a laser disc.

So it was basically one of those things where they could keep playing it back and it would be the same quality every time and it would only degenerate with the recording to the VHS tape.

So that's one of the things that bootleggers latched on to.

And I think that is why laser disc also became super big in the horror community because some ways that was the only way to get it is you would import it or you would buy it.

Or you would buy a boot from somebody that imported it.

That's how I saw Cat in the Brain the first time too.

That was also a laser disc import I think from Japan with subtitles as well still.

You know some of the guys figured out a way to shut off the subtitle channel and you were like you were good.

You were in heaven.

You know.

I've never bothered me.

I thought it gave you authenticity.

Yeah.

There's something about watching a bootleg with Japanese subtitles that makes it that much more effective.

My first copy of a racer head was also a Japanese laser disc bootleg now that I think of it.

Right.

I actually can't remember what the films we watched on laser disc were.

Like the actual ones he had.

It's weird.

It's all sort of a blur now.

I do remember that there's one film he showed me that I have never seen since.

I have no idea what it's called.

And no one's ever been able to tell me what it is.

But with your encyclopedic knowledge I bet you know it.

We could give it a shot.

That would be a fun segment of.

Does cartonola the fuck this is?

There we go.

If only I had four examples to do more weeks.

So.

Yeah.

We might be on something there.

No.

So all I remember about this is there's a guy lives in a house fairly remote and is a girlfriend or his wife and she dies.

I can't remember how she dies.

He can't bear to be without her.

So he takes her home and there's a fairly graphic.

Embarming scene basically.

Where he disembowels and clears everything out.

Stuff fills her up, zips her up, whatever.

And then basically keeps her in a cupboard.

And I don't remember much more than that other than the.

You know the that's more than seen was quite graphic.

That sounds an awful lot like Jody.

I think it's beyond the darkness because a lot of that is based on a guy that keeps a specific woman who died and her corpse and just keeps coming back to like snuggling with it and hides it.

That's the only thing I can think of right off the top.

Did it have a do you remember if it was like a redneck kind of guy or was it just more like a wafish just weird, you know, not super masculine type guy.

I don't remember the guy.

My memory tells me it was probably Italian.

Yeah.

That would be Joe Demados beyond the darkness probably more than likely.

I do not.

Maybe I do own a copy of it.

If I do, I will send it to you.

And and you can confer back on our next episode.

Holy fuck that was it.

What the fuck did I watch?

You know that kind of thing.

Yeah.

So after saying we were going to talk about horror and there's fucking 20 minutes horror for you ladies and gentlemen.

Well, come on.

We talked about various formats of horror for goodness sakes, you know, yes, that's true.

This is just general.

Yeah, I need about to cut all that shit out of your other podcast.

So that's, you know, it's good.

We get to leave it alone.

That's why I started doing out takes again because I'm like, I'm not just leaving this in the episode and I'm also like, I'm not just leaving this in the episode and I'm also like, I'm just leaving this in the episode.

And I'm also not dropping it.

We love the outtakes.

So, I mean, other sort of, we clearly share some taste in music, especially, yeah, again, going back to your show this week of some growling death metal lyrics and some slayer show up.

I was like, yes.

Well, I had to do the growling whenever we were talking about malicious castration, which is a charge that you can be levied on for doing such an act of castrating someone maliciously.

That was impressed with the vocals.

You used to sing in the death band or was that a hardcore band?

Okay, so I was in a band for in like high school that I did death metal lyrics and death metal growling, but it was more like six feet under where it was like middle paced because we couldn't play any faster.

I can't with you.

But, you know, it was mostly I did a lot of growling and stuff like that. And then I stopped with the growling when I actually learned a little bit more about how to sing basically upon the urging of my parents because they're like, you can actually sing.

Why are you doing this?

You know, they're like, you can you can still sound like, you know, is metal as you want and sing. I mean, look at Aussie is what my dad's excuse was.

So, you know, I was I was like, okay, well, we'll give that a shot and I learned how to sing, but I also learned how to do the death metal grow without destroying my voice by practicing and mimicking and I was like, oh, it's all breath control and making it sound more like you growl than you can.

And then when I went off to college, I formed a while I ended up kind of falling into forming a band with one of my classmates in electronics.

And that band was more like a hardcore sort of hardcore punk sort of like like the crossover style stuff very heavily influenced by neurosis. I don't know if you've heard of them. They've been around for like ever.

Yeah, I've had bits. Yeah. Yeah. So it was pretty influenced by neurosis. So there was some growling involved in that. And then it was also it had a little bit of fear factory, you know, sprinkled in there. And then about the time that slipknot broke, we got kind of influenced by some of the stuff that slipknot was doing.

Not so much with like the rap metal mix, but just sort of like the serious hardcore crazy death metal lyrics, but like sort of growly, shouty, singing back and forth, you know, and then like actual like operatic singing mixed in, you know, that kind of stuff.

So I was jumping back and forth with that kind of stuff. And I mean, that band did okay. We were able to kind of, I was able to kind of pay my rent, you know, a little bit every now and then.

Did you record any?

Yeah, we did record some stuff, but nothing, nothing to nothing too worthwhile. A lot of the stuff is just like straight out of the board and, you know, into a stereo cassette tape recording. I don't know where any of that shit is.

But yeah, I actually, I got a lot of stuff. I just have to find it and then convert it from a cassette tape into like a somewhat listenable audio format because I've been in tons of bands.

I actually started recording albums and things like that in like 10th grade. I recorded a full album over the summer of ninth grade and into 10th grade and released it by the middle of 10th grade.

The band was shit, but you know, what were other people doing in 10th grade? I recorded an entire album's worth of songs that we wrote. There was like no covers of it.

Yeah.

I mean, sure it sucked, but you know, it's no worse than like some of GGL and stuff.

Yeah, I mean, the music might have sucked, but I bet the audio was pristine.

Ah, that was before I learned what I was doing.

Hey, it's all, it's all a journey. I mean, you know, if you come to my sort of audio prowess and where I learned about getting sounds to be a bit better than they are normally, you know, that was, that was running the church board at a evangelical church on a Sunday morning for most of my early teenage years.

So if you want a guy who can go up and mix two vocalists and four acoustic guitar players playing the same chords at the same time and make them sound slightly distinct from one another, I'm your guy.

Wow.

Yeah.

Because it's what they did, isn't it? Like, why did it need to be three guitarists? Why are you all playing the same? You're not even harmonizing. You're all playing the same chord progression with the same timing. One of you sit down.

Why can't one of you play a bass? Exactly.

Or perhaps a baritone guitar and move to the root note or something.

Yeah, or, you know, pick apart each and pause for a second. Yeah, it's laughable.

I once went to a conference where they, the musicians all went off to learn one thing and then all the PA guys went off to another room and they brought in some musicians and they went, how many people Sunday mornings like this are they all played the same thing once.

Yeah, yeah, that's that's it. They said, no, this is what it should be like and they all played different parts and we went, oh, actually a little green alien story.

See, I was such a fucking anarchist, even though I was dragged to church every goddamn Sunday, I wasn't allowed to do anything involved with the church because they were assured that I would do something horrible.

Every Sunday school teacher I've ever had catered me.

Oh, because I questioned everything and I made their life a living hell and they're like, look, I'm volunteering. Can't you just push the I believe button and I'm like, have you met me?

Have you seen most tattooed on my forehead?

Oh, yeah, that was way before I was even going to have any hope of getting tattooed.

I wasn't even allowed to shave my head back then, even though I was losing my hair.

Okay.

Yeah, my parents are pricks.

Love you now, mom and dad, did not so much then, maybe.

I mean, it was weird to me because I was never sort of forbidden from anything.

I was just encouraged strongly by that environment to do certain things and not do others, but I do remember in my late teenage years going to like a youth group thing.

And I was pro tattooing and I had a design. I was going to have it done.

Weirdly at 42 years old, I still do not have a blot of ink anywhere on my body, which considering like I was tattoo and piercing culture from the age of probably 14 or 15, the people I hung out with had tattoos and piercings.

I hung out with bikers and metalheads and horror fans who were pretty much the only people who did that to themselves back then because it wasn't as trendy as it is now and everybody got a tattoo.

And I'm actually at the point now. I'm like, I'm kind of unusual because I haven't got any ink because I barely know anybody now who is, you know, a blank canvas, I suppose.

So I'm like, I don't know. I just, I feel like I missed the boat a little bit. How am I going to get any done? But we, because I was very much in the mindset of I was going to go that route and the church is quite resistant to it.

They set up this debate and I said, okay, yeah, I'm going to debate pro tattooing and you can try and use the Bible to stop me. I won that debate hands down.

And it's not difficult because it's the whole, well, you can't eat prawns. I win.

Well, the idea, yeah, the idea about biblical, the use of a book that is a bronze age guide written by xenophobic, homophobic, assist hateful people under the guise of this is a command from God.

It's very easy to use that book against someone who's trying to prove a point and there's no point in debating that type of book because first of all, you have to believe that it's the 100% word of God.

And if you do debating that book, then becomes impossible because no one is going to be open to that because they 100% believe that this is the word of God and how dare you question it.

And so when people start salad baring it and taking, you know, their various interpretations, like, for instance, they will say you can't mark your skin because that was in Leviticus or you shouldn't mention live with man because that was in Leviticus.

You then point out, well, you have a blended shirt on and therefore you should be put to death according to like two chapters out down from what you just quoted me, or you're not allowed to eat shellfish.

Take the fucking prawn out of your mouth because that was three chapters up from what you just quoted me like they don't want to hear it like they want to hear that the stuff that they're okay with that justifies their own preconceived notions is good.

And anything, anything that doesn't is automatically well you're obviously misinterpreting that that scripture no it clearly says blended fabrics, which poly cotton which you are currently wearing with that t shirt is a blended fabric and you should be put to death.

So we're going to do this or what?

Yeah, exactly.

And I was fighting the homophobia side of it is very interesting because you've got the old books, you know, Old Testament is overwritten in part I guess by the covenant of the New Testament.

And it's like Jesus never said shit about it.

Well, and he also he was still going on.

He also hung out with prostitutes and like all of the people that were supposed to be like put to death in the other book.

He was like, no, they're cool man, you know, they're going to be fine.

Come on, hang out with me and my dad, you know, apparently that's how that's supposed to work.

But there's also debate upon whether or not the actual Jesus actually existed or if he was an amalgamation of a bunch of different people because all of the writings of various prophets were also written by people like centuries.

Later under the guise of being the Apostle Paul and then you can't really go with all of these various accounts like you can't like that book has been so rewritten and edited and changed again and then like, well, we won't even get into Constantine.

How much he got the quorum of people together to decide what was biblical canon and what wasn't.

But we should get off the subject because man, that's.

Although, I mean, I've never bothered with the Dan Brown series. I don't know. I guess this is sort of along the same lines, but of all the heists that people might have wanted to plan through history, the one I want to happen the most is I just want the Vatican to be like rinsed.

I just everything they're sitting on to just be released on the Internet as PDFs. Yeah, they're whoa to see. There is so much history and text and artwork. And yes, they may be keeping it in vaults and protecting it, but at the same, you know, like from destruction and all of that, but at the same time they're also keeping it from being out there for all of us to see and kind of know what's going on.

That stuff exists and they won't let anyone near it because it proves them wrong. That's why it's there. Yeah, and if you've seen Red Dwarf, you know, for a fact that Page One of the Bible is hidden in their most secure vault.

And if you haven't seen Red Dwarf, you're probably listening to the wrong show. Yeah.

Oh, that was my teenage years to, for those of you who don't know, Page One is all events featured in this book are purely fictional. Any resemblance to characters either living or dead as purely coincidental.

God, what a brilliant show.

We're getting TV adverts now of them on Starbug One on the planet. I think it's an RAC advert, a breakdown company, and they call them in to get their Starbug started again. They're all quite a bit older.

But I mean, they pull it off. It is fairly entertaining. Be like, whoa, someone ran out of money.

Now, have you seen the, they had a like a resurgence movie or two where they come back and they're dealing with things? And I remember watching that and just feeling really sad because of how old they were and like it just doesn't have some of the same magic, but just being so so to have them all back together.

Yeah, there were two whole series. They did 10 and 11. I didn't finish 11, but I did watch series 10 and it wasn't bad.

In fact, there's a hilarious episode where they go back and bump into who they think is Jesus.

Keep it on topic. Interesting. Now, that was released over here as like full fledged like movies where they just cut them all together because the way that that the series was released, they all bled in together story to story, which was completely different than anything that they done before.

So they just put it together as a movie over here.

Is that the one that's very blade runner? Yeah, because that was like a special. So that was like a proof of concept because that went down fairly well.

Holy shit, there's two seasons I haven't even seen yet, then, is what you're telling me. Yeah, like 10 episode two, 10 episode season or eight episode seasons.

If my friend Anthony listens to this, he's a big podcast listener. He used to do a show called the Scuttercast.

And he has met pretty much every member of cast of Red Dwarf and he is the authority on Red Dwarf.

So I'll check with him how many episodes there actually were, but holy shit, if there are at least even just one series that I haven't even seen yet,

I may have to retract my statement about how sad it is because that got me a whole new series from that movie. That's awesome.

Yeah, yeah. I don't know if they're doing anymore, but they did two series and then now TV adverts, which, yeah.

Who knows what's coming next? I mean, the gold of the original is it, but you're never going to recreate shit like, you know, backwards in the poly morph.

Those episodes are just like, they're just legendary. I love them so much.

The backwards planet is so much. The backwards planet is amazing.

Yeah.

I still say, not, not know when I'm going to London. I mean, it's just a thing.

You know, all the time, whenever someone tells me, ask me what flavor, like if I order a milkshake and they ask me what flavor I want, I always say beer.

And then I have to amend it.

I just, I used to use the term, you've got all the charm and social grace of an sensation after a head swap. It's still up there. It's all still up there.

Yeah. Oh, God, I love that show so much. Yeah.

It was, I always love it when, I mean, Timo, who's co-host on Little Potter horrors, the reason we became such fast friends so quickly is when we met.

It's like, here's this guy from a country I know nothing about, which the entire country has the same population of just London.

They have the population London spread across our entire country. And that's fairly sparse.

So, when he comes out and he loves stuff like The Fast Show and Red Dwarf, and like all the shit I grew up as a teenager watching, and he loves it and finds it hilarious, which could exactly the same as a humour, because we've just absorbed the same media.

It's fascinating.

It's amazing how entertainment can actually unite like that. There was a, there was a thing that Henry Rollins did about how to actually create world peace, or at least how to get boring sides of, you know, like two different sides of a faction.

Like one of the things he was saying was like, maybe like Israel and Palestine, or one of those types of things where like people couldn't get along, where his idea was that the Ramones could heal the world.

What you do is you drop like the first two records, you split them up where like one record goes to one side, the one record goes to the other, and then you just do another thing where you do like a massive drop where you release like another album on one side, another album on the other.

And then like you get the folks hooked on the Ramones, you get them into that type of music.

And then what you do is you have them kind of meet and then realise that they both love this thing that is the Ramones and that's like, holy shit, there's another album I didn't know about.

And they start swapping records and talking about it, you know, and then like you use that as a way to like kind of bring them together over a mutual love of the Ramones.

And I'm fucking up his theory because obviously he can explain it so much more eloquently and beautifully and he's obviously thought it out way better than what I can describe, right?

Yeah, but he's another common grand thing for us, isn't he?

Yeah, but like that I went to sort of live a couple of years ago in London doing his spoken word thing.

So, yeah, yes, and that particular diatribe or that idea that you can unite people under a common banner of their love of a certain type of entertainment and that the idea that the Ramones could actually broker a piece was so astoundingly beautiful to me that it just totally made sense.

And like I just, I haven't met anyone who actively hates the Ramones.

I've only ever met people that are like, it's just not my thing.

But like you play it enough, it gets stuck in your head and it just becomes a part of you.

Yeah, see, I never went there, but like you say, I've heard it many a time and it is just completely inoffensive.

Well, that's only if you don't pay close enough attention to it because if you listen to the lyrics very closely, all they're talking about all sorts of screwed up stuff.

Well, that helps us segue into something we're planning to do here with this little show.

Basically, after several hundred episodes of cinema science that I've listened to, I've realized that the length and breadth of course musical knowledge is far out of the way.

And it's far outstrips mine.

I was a metalhead from 13 years old onwards and probably until my early twenties really didn't listen to anything else, just different types of metal.

Coming out of that, I mean, I do like a bit of like classical.

I was forced into listening to musicals because my sister went to stage school when she was younger.

We used to have to drive in and out of London, we used to go in on a Friday and pick her up and then back in on a Sunday night to drop her back off for the next week of school.

And because she was at stage school, she lived, eat, breathe, shit, musicals.

And so all the way there was like, was cats, like mares, fandom of the opera.

I knew, I know every lyric to every song from every musical.

So, and I was quite young at the time.

I was like seven, eight, nine.

So it just like zorbed it all like a sponge.

Of course now my favourites are stuff like Avenue, Cuban, Book of Mormon, but.

[laughter]

But in terms of sort of, you know, classic rock, things like that, you know, this stuff I know I've heard on the radio, but you put some totally obscure shit into your podcast at times.

And I'm like, I have never heard of this.

Some of it are really quite dig.

So I thought, how about we have a section where, core each week or each episode, introduces me to music I've probably never heard or an artist.

I've never heard of.

And we see what the fuck I think about.

Now, I was trying to think of a title for this.

And I thought, well, you know, maybe the word, music file.

[laughter]

Well, if I'm exposing things to you, and it's more than likely not going to be decent, we should just call it a decent exposure.

Yeah, okay.

I mean, that's, that is better because.

[laughter]

Have you ever come across the word music file?

No, I don't even know if that's a word.

Do you have a Google window to hand?

Do I have to?

I feel like this is going to be nasty and get me on some kind of a watch list.

Just tap it in there.

M-U-S-O-P-H-I-L-E.

M-U-S-O-P-H-I-L-E.

Yeah.

Because, I mean, I don't know, this could be your proclivity.

It could be something that you do enjoy.

I don't know you all that well.

[laughter]

Someone or those who have a love or fondness for mice.

[laughter]

Apparently so.

[laughter]

So, I thought I'd made up a word, but apparently it's already a word.

Yeah.

I mean, I'm not a-

You like mice?

I'm not a- I'm not opposed to mice, but I don't know if I like mice enough to be known as someone who has a love for mice, so much so that I would adopt that word.

Okay, so yeah, let's go with indecent exposure and put a nice little motion.

Yeah, that fits our sense of humor anyway.

It does.

[laughter]

So, what have you got for me, sir?

Okay.

You're a fan of the misfits, I would assume.

You know the misfits already?

I know of the misfits, yes.

Okay.

Well, they're my fan or not, probably not, because I've not-

It's one of these- I hear stuff.

I think that's really good.

I should look that up and then don't.

I play them relatively frequently on my show.

Now, there is a band from Japan that is actually what is known as a visual K type music.

Now, I might be getting that wrong and I might be mispronouncing it, but basically they're more based on theatrical type things and they usually go overboard and do like as much visual styling to their performances and their videos and all of that kind of stuff.

And it usually is like, sort of like almost like a cross-dressing kind of thing, very David Bowie type influence thing.

Okay.

Now, there's a specific type of visual K band in Japan by the name of Balzac, B-A-L-Z-A-C.

That was very heavily influenced by the misfits, so much so that they even kind of stole their skull, the misfits skull and like appropriated it.

And around the time that Jerry only was doing his thing, post-firing Michael Graves from the second iteration of the misfits, Balzac kind of worked together with them and they did like a dual,

split single for a song called the Earthcaught Fire because they are very heavily influenced by the misfits so much so that they basically sound like they're doing a misfits cover only with a Japanese accent to it.

So, now this was on the Balzac album entitled Beyond the Darkness, but it also got released here in the States as a split seven inch, I believe, for the day the Earthcaught Fire.

So that's what I'm going to play for you now and for everyone that may not have heard this band because they're fucking badass and they went beyond being just like a misfits type emulation band, but that's kind of where they got their start back in like 2000, like the early 2001, 2002, 2003, somewhere around there.

Okay, Peggy.

Thank you, Peggy.

The reason for that is when Eric Cartman sings, right?

It's actually the reason that it sounds like that, though, the reason it sounds like Eric Cartman singing, which is really funny is whenever they are actually doing their offensive Japanese accent, they nail it perfectly because that's exactly how this guy sounds when he sings.

Some of his other stuff isn't quite as operatic, but they're trying to emulate the misfits on the day the Earthcaught Fire so much so that they're trying to hit that style, you know, and they can hear that definitely.

And it's just a really interesting band. Now, the thing that's funny about Ballzak is they actually start doing, like, really leaning into, like, sort of their visual case stuff and they start releasing, like, other types of music that's still very similar.

One of the things that the guy, the main guy for their visual look is wearing like a skeleton onesie, like, type of outfit where it's a zips up the front and it's got a skeleton painted on it, but it's like really loose fitting.

And then he has, like, a paper bag kind of thing he puts on his head that's covered in blood, and that's how he performs. Yeah.

That was awesome. Okay, now this is from the album Deep Blue, colon, chaos from Darkism. I guess that's a direct translation.

I didn't pay for this album. I just got it because there was the only way I could get it.

We're going to do their cover of Ziggy Stardust from that album. I shit you not. Alright, you ready? Okay.

[music]

[music]

[music]

[music]

[music]

Okay, now you have to keep in mind this is a man singing English and it's not his first language.

I just decided like someone's taking the piss. It's not gonna get passed.

No, I totally get that. Now, the reason that I'm so up on this band is back in, like, 2001, no, 2002.

It was shortly after I moved to Omaha, there was a tour that went through that was, Misfits was the headliners.

I think it was called Fiendfest, and BallZack came over to America to be on that tour.

And it was the first time I'd ever seen them or heard of them or anything like that.

I saw them perform that day on the show. Now, I was totally into it, and so they're walking around, you know, after they performed and like other bands are on.

And I'm trying to talk to the guys and the English is not their first language, so they know enough, but, you know, it's a little difficult.

So we can't really understand, but the way that we ended up communicating is I kind of like, you know, told them I dug their band and they kind of got that.

And then he started noticing some of the patches on my battle vest that I was wearing, and I was noticing some of the patches on his coat.

So we're like pointing at patches, like super excited, like the guys in this band and I, and we're like chatting back and forth and like giving thumbs up and like, you know, the devil horns to all these various bands.

And I did like the international sign for, do you want to do a shot? You know, where you just kind of like throw it back like you're doing a shot and they all shake their head.

Yeah. And so like, I take them all to the bar and I bought like, I think the guitar player, the singer, and I think the drummer, I bought the three of them shots and then and myself.

And we did shots and then like they bought around for me. And like, we were just trying to pick out like I was like, what I was trying to figure out what kind of drink they liked and they were trying to figure out what I liked.

And so we kind of settled on like, we're just pointing at a bottle and they would look at it and see if they recognized it and then like, you know, they would make like a throw up sign or like a thumbs up.

And like that's how we started doing it. And so I was doing shots with these guys and they're so much fucking fun. They're so like, they have so much great energy live and it was such a blast that like, I will always have that memory from hanging out with them at the show after like really digging their performance.

And I can totally get your that sounds like someone taking a piss and it sounds like Eric Cartman because I get it. I totally get that as well. But like, I know what the guy looks like. I actually have done shots with him.

And so like, I, you know, the accent and the voice doesn't bug me at all.

I'm glad I wasn't too disrespectful.

No, you're not.

Let's go fighting love.

You're not wrong. It does sound kind of like Eric Cartman the way that he sings. But the thing about that was like, I didn't hear that, you know, live when I heard them perform and I don't hear it.

I just hear the guy that I saw perform live is just how it always is for me. But there you go. So that's a, that's a band you might want to check out.

And yeah, they are, they are kind of tongue in cheek. They are just kind of having fun with it. They're, they're a bunch of really cool guys from what I remember.

And there you go. That balls act.

It's just such a great name as well.

It's totally up my street.

And it sounded like Eric Cartman is not going to put me off because, yeah, I don't know if you've seen my handle here on Skype.

It is that that's my Twitter name as well.

Cart Bosman, which is basically Cartman with Bos in the middle. And that's been my internet avatar for over 12 years now because I was like, I was watching South.

We talked about those movie collectors fairs. I bought the first box set of VHS tapes of South Park, episodes one to 10 at one of those collector fairs in NTSC because my VHS player happened to play NTSC as well.

And I was like, these are going to be collectors items. I bought collectible buttons, toys, badges, thinking, yeah, this is going to be so niche because like, this is so disrespectful.

It's a cartoon, but it's for adults. And, you know, this will be flashing the pan. And I found the thing I'm going to collect.

And then it just took off like a motherfucker.

Merch everywhere, every shop, errors when I fuck it. And I just stopped.

I remember when that came out. I was in high school when that came out or junior high or something like that.

I can't remember exactly when, but I was like, around the timeframe to where I was at a friend's house.

No, it was high school. So it's like towards the middle run of high school for me when it came out all those years ago.

And it was like two episodes in and the bass player in my band who I'm still friends with to this day.

Bill, he was like, dude, you have to check out this show. It is insane. It is so offensive.

And he was telling me about the episode with Barbara Streisand and Rose Shambow and all that kind of stuff.

And he's like, and he's like, and it's got this kaiju thing. You just got to see it. And I'm like, yeah, whatever.

And so.

Yeah, but he recorded it. So, you know, he had it on VHS and he brought it to my house. He's like, just check it out.

It's 30 minutes. And I was an instant fan. And so I made an excuse to be at his house on the night that it aired every fucking week from there on out.

And so like my entire high school run was at his house for that night regularly just to watch that show and maybe consume illicit substances and, you know,

you know, it was better than. Yeah, well, totally.

The blog blog episodes and stuff like that. Yeah. Right. And so like I became obsessed with that. And then by the time I had gotten to college, I kind of fell off and didn't even realize that it was still a thing.

And then like, I guess I got cable in my adulthood and I was like, holy shit, how long has this show been on?

Yeah.

I mean, there's hundreds of episodes I haven't seen.

But when they went into more like, you know, current event satire stuff, I did pick up a few episodes then, but it's still so off the wall.

Yeah. But it praises itself on being the most vile and offensive thing it possibly can be that will still get aired weekly.

And I respect what they do because they make the show within one week. Everything they do, they do all that animation.

They geared it specifically to do it in one week. And I have to respect that production level regardless of anything else.

They did like a little documentary of making of one episode. It was a human centipat episode.

And they show sort of behind the scenes of what it takes and how near the line they get before they've got a show sometimes.

And yeah, it's a really fucking stressful environment if the comedy generators aren't particularly fire in that week.

It's funny now, I think if I still had those VHS tapes, I'd probably treasure them.

I probably should have kept hold of them because I mean, it was so, so early adopting.

But I just everywhere I went, I did Cartman impression. So it just became when the having an avatar name in forums and things like that came up.

I'm like, it was just a no brainer. And there is a little picture of Eric Cartman just with my face superimposed over his.

Because I don't, I used to say I'm not fat. I'm big boned along before he did.

So it just identified with him so much, you know, and my favorite clip was, I am the deadly Mexican staring frog from Southern Sri Lanka.

I used to do that one all the time.

Man, yeah, that show that show is definitely far ahead of its time.

And it's funny how it's just basically caught up to its time.

Basically, it's lasted so long that all the other stuff that it's influenced and has become touchstones of pop culture that now it just fits, you know?

Yeah, yeah.

And it's amazing the staying power it has like I'm still shocked when it's on the air, like it's still on the air.

And I'm like, what the fuck, man? This is like 30 some years old.

Simpson's did the same and were irrelevant for like the last two entire season.

I don't know anybody who was still watching that.

And people were largely disappointed when they did.

South Park seems to just keep the interest.

And, you know, then of course they went off and did.

Again, I heard really early on that they'd written this musical and somehow I got a notification the day the Book of Mormon album dropped in the UK, which was two entire years before it arrived at the West End here in London.

So I knew every lyric after week one of its release and nobody in this country had fucking heard of the Book of Mormon musical. Nobody.

It was such an under the radar thing.

And I put it on in my van and I drove to work that morning.

I listened to the first four tracks.

Hasse-Diga-Iba-Y came on.

I'd shit you not, I nearly crashed my van. I could not see for tears.

I was laughing so hard.

Because of course I've got to tie into this because a large proportion of my family is Mormon.

Oh, wow.

I know a lot of people don't find it that funny, perhaps, especially not just listening to the music because they don't have the experience.

They don't know about the religion.

But of course I had to know about it growing up because I was on the opposite side of the religious fences.

So, you know, so to speak.

And, you know, certain members had tried to influence other family members of mine to join their ranks.

And, you know, so I was quite aware of a lot of it.

And the proselytizing debates during Christmas alone would be ridiculous.

[Laughs]

It's just, yeah.

And the jokes I make in that, and some of the more subtle ones, I mean, I got all of them.

And I just, what are the best days?

I just, I must have listened to it four times in the first two days, the whole album.

"Spooky Mormon Hell Dream", just a genius song.

Yeah. And I've seen it four times at the theatre.

And I laugh myself every single time.

I have yet to see it, but I've been wanting to.

It just, you know, doesn't really tour here.

You know, I was kind of hoping that they would do a film adaptation, but, you know, musicals...

I'm sure they will one day. It's got to be done.

Yeah, musicals are actually something that they have deep in their DNA.

The very first thing that those two did together was actually cannibal, the musical.

They got released by Trauma.

And, I mean, several of their episodes, like if they can't figure anything else out,

they just do a quick musical, you know, because they're so quick at just writing songs

and putting stuff together.

And yes, a lot of the musicals may sound a lot alike because they're just doing some of the same backing tracks for the music,

but every single thing that they've ever done audio-wise has always been super funny to me.

Like, I still love the Brian Boythano song.

Like, I still jam out of that when it comes on my iPod or iPhone now, but iPod back then, you know?

And I like the rock cover on the album, actually.

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I can't say any further than that.

Thank you for joining us ladies and gentlemen.

Please come back again.

I think we just got a slogan there.

Yes, you did.

B U double L F H I T New word.

A R T I F T Bell bullshit artist.

- Bullshit, artists!

(upbeat music)

- Oh, sorry. Sorry. Kind of.

(laughing)

Good.

(laughing)

- Screw you guys, I'm gang- (laughing)

- Ballzak is not happy with me.

Yeah, we'll always mean to talk about one thing,

but completely talk about something else,

because that is the art of bullshit.

Cinema_PSYOPS_BozFestBonus2: Bullsh*t Artists Episode 1
Broadcast by